Entertainment News - TV

THIS ISSUE: Big Brother, Wayward Pines, American Gothic, The Real Housewives of New York City, MasterChef TOP MOMENT OF THE NIGHT Big Brother Has a Star CBS BECAUSE: Jozea might have been looking for an Aquarius crossover deal over on Wednesday's Big Brother. A few of his bold declarations include: "I feel like I'm the Messiah"; "We are all sisters and brothers"; "I'm CEO, in my mind"; and "Who rules the majority? Me." But don't get too attached to Jozea's particular brand of crazy -- his cluelessness when it comes to the actual gameat play has us fearing that he's about to pull a classic Big Brother supernova: they shine too bright and too early before imploding into a black hole of their own Messiah visions.

Wayward Pines Fox WHAT HAPPENED: The good news in Wednesday's Wayward Pines: the town's chief jerk Jason is failing, big time. The bad news, of course, is that the Abbies have officially attacked and are destroying crops and killing people.Pilcher never planned on his lil' utopia having to defend itself in war, and yet here we are. Whether Jason wants to hear it or not (he so doesn't), the Abbies clearly knew what they were doing. They knew how to use fire and that the humans needed the crops to survive, so they lit those crops on fire and targeted their first attack at the men with hoses. Now, 35 residents -- including Theresa -- are dead. The Abbies have populated the area where the crops used to be, and it is seeming more and more likely that Margaret isn't simply an introverted Abbie. No, Theo orders a CT scan that shows her brain's center of language and advanced thought is double the size of a human's. The episode ends with the Abbies screaming just outside the fence as Margaret knowingly glares into the camera. WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING: Things are getting real, as the threat of citizens actually starving to death seems more of a possibility than an impossibility. The A.V. Club points out that the idea that the Abbies are simply a reactive population is driven home over and over again in Wednesday's episode: "First, by the opening flashback, in which their idyllic peaceful community ended in a hail of bullets from Pilcher's helicopter, and later by wielding the torches they had never employed until the soldiers attacked them with fire. This overt warning against ignoring the Golden Rule is giving season two a sense of rueful 'too little, too late' in terms of the possibility of surviving the Aberration threat."

American Gothic CBS WHAT HAPPENED: As if things weren't already spooky enough on American Gothic, now we get a funeral! Wednesday's episode sees the Hawthornespreparing for their patriarch's funeral (remember how his wife Madeline suffocated him with a pillow?), and picking up more clues about the Silver Bells Killer. As for that box of silver bells the kids found in the garage last week, Madeline has a simple explanation: just like everyone else with a Netflix subscription, daddy was obsessed with true crime! Plus, his recent onset of dementia had him believing that he was actually the SBK. Uh huh. And at his funeral, he's appropriately eulogized by his creepy grandson Jack, whose parents are having sex in the church bathroom so that Cam won't fall off the drug wagon. Jack shows little interest in his grandfather's death, but a lot of interest in rigor mortis and postmortem fingernail growth. WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING: By the end of the episode, Detective Cutter calls Tessa's police husband Brady to tell him that they've just discovered that the belt from the tunnel collapse didn't belong to the SBK victim, but to the actual Silver Bells Killer. It's the same belt that Brady sees Cam wearing in an old photo with his dad. So the mystery on American Gothic is heating up, and it's a good thing, because Previously TV is finding it difficult to like any of the actual characters: "For the most part, that's the writers' fault: the characters are drawn in such broad strokes that it's tough to connect with any of them." Indeed, our options as of now for whodunit include "the domineering, calculating matriarch; the credulous, sweet-as-pie younger daughter; the f---up-but-trying-to-get-clean younger son; the type-A and always-smiling elder daughter; and the mysterious wayward son who vanished 14 years ago and returns to the family homestead wielding (a) contempt for all and (b) SECRETSSSSSSSSSSSS." If the belt fits...

The Real Housewives of New York City Bravo WHAT HAPPENED: Only on The Real Housewives of New York City can an entire plot line be fueled by a particularly bizarre calzone. And vaginas -- so many vaginas. As EW recapper Tim Stack writes, "RHONY is on its way to doing for vagina issues what RHOBH did for Lyme disease." Wednesday's episode picks up at a pizza place where customers can make their own personal pizza. Jules arrives first and asks for a stack of napkins to sit on because of her recent crotch-to-window-sill incident. Around the time Bethenny arrives to fill everyone in on her very serious nether region problem, Jules is busting out the official photo documentation of her accident. Everyone ready for pizza? Good! Because Dorinda is going with prosciutto and arugula, while Jules for some reason decides to joke about baking in some pills. But for real, she decides to for throw the marinara cup into her calzone. Carole decides that's indicative of her problematic relationship with food and asks Jules how much she weighs. And that upsets Jules enough to call Dorinda to her house later for a mentor chat. Dorinda wears a fabulous Missoni cape and tells Jules she has to air her issues directly to the ladies. This is the Real Housewives, after all. WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING: While it's easy to joke about just how muchvagina talk there is on RHONY right now, it doesn't change the fact that Bethenny's upcoming surgery is very serious. The fear that comes along with not having any family to support her draws out much more empathy than a typical Bravo viewer might expect. That's why Vulture calls out Bethenny's driver Kevin as the real MVP of this episode: "Who is this saint that sits and listens to Bethenny Frankel's phone calls all day while he carts her around to lunch appointments, business meetings, eyebrow-waxing interludes, and after-hours assignations with good-looking divorced men who have daughters old enough to have Snapchat numbers in the low millions? ... When Bethenny is just blubbering to a friend in the backseat about her surgery, I love how Kevin just says, very calmly and as if no one is really listening, 'You'll be alright.' Yes, thanks for that, Kevin. Here is your quarterly bonus."

One More Thing...

It's Latin Night on MasterChef Fox GUEST JUDGE, BEST JUDGE: Aarón Sanchez stops by MasterChef to judge a Latin-themed Mystery Box challenge. We're just wondering, what are the chances Chopped is willing to loan him out as a full-time judge?