When I Quit Believing in Eventually
“God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning — the sixth day.” Genesis 1:31 (NIV)
I was 11 years old when I first flipped through the glossy pages of Seventeen Magazine with a friend.
It was in those pages I internalized the message that acceptance and belonging would come when I was “just the right size.” Have you believed that lie? The dieting and beauty industries spend billions of dollars hoping that you do. The problem is that compulsive dieting creates an eventually mindset.
Eventually, when the scale reads a certain number, you will belong, you tell yourself. Eventually, when your jeans reach a certain size, you will feel loved.
Thankfully, God reconciled all eventuallys on the cross.
“It is finished,” Jesus said, and in that moment, it was. What makes us irresistibly lovely is that we are loved by a God who never makes mistakes.
Genesis 1:31, today’s key verse, explains this for us: “God saw all that he had made, and it was very good. And there was evening, and there was morning — the sixth day.”
God made the entire world and called it “good,” but it was when He made man and woman in His image that He pronounced His creation as “very good.” In fact, the Hebrew wording for “very good” in Genesis is the same phrase used for beautiful. Yes, this is what resonates. We are beautiful, we are worthy, we are loved.
A few months ago, I found myself in an impromptu photo shoot on the beaches of Haiti. I looked at the picture my friend took of me splashing near the shore in my swimsuit and for the first time, instead of focusing on all the things I wished I could change about my body, I made a choice: Speak aloud all of the things I’m thankful for about my body.
My curvy hips carried two babies. My strong arms carried my son whom I adopted when he was 3 years old. My ample thighs help me indoor cycle like it’s my job. When I consciously choose self-compassion, joy and freedom, I am no longer hindered by the limiting (and false) belief that size matters more than anything.
With these affirmations in my head, I gathered my courage and posted that swimsuit picture on Instagram, along with a caption about how scary it had felt to hit “post.” And I was in awe at the response. Women from all over gave me a virtual high five and began sharing the ways their insecurities and fears have been barriers to them stepping out in courage.
If it feels like you’re swimming upstream as you fight to believe you’re worthy just as you are, it’s because you are swimming upstream. It’s hard, and there are so many forces at work to keep you from gaining ground. But do you know what I have found to be true? When we all gather to swim upstream together, we change the current.
While I can still slip into daydreaming about my “eventual” aspirational body that looks like the pages of Seventeen Magazine, I now recognize that daydream for what it is: a lie that keeps me from finding my real belonging in Christ. This lie keeps me from receiving my own completion on the cross.
When I acknowledge that negative mindset and turn toward self-compassion and thankfulness, I can pull on my swimsuit and choose fun. Freedom is ours — both in and out of swimsuit season. Accepting ourselves as image bearers of a beautiful God is where we finally find belonging.
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